Some of you may be wondering why my blog is about me and my daddy dom when it is aimed at my life journey of finding myself. Well, I started my journey after I met him. I have always known I was different than others, in many different aspects. It wasn’t until I met him that this was even more evident because of how similar me and him are. He prompted me to find myself and he gave me clues here and there. He became not only my dom but my mentor, my teacher, my lover, my confidante, my Clyde, my Mr. J. When I finally realized who I was I talked and laughed and it all made sense. I asked him when did he know and he said “within minutes, I saw it in your eyes”. We have a bond, a connection, that is unlike any other because there is no other. Our connection is merely ours and ours alone. I believe the universe sent him to me to help, guide me, show me who I am. I will always love him even if it is only for that reason. I believe he knows he will always own me and I will forever be his no matter what happens. There will be no other him. I am vulnerable because of this. I am still scared at times. The mind is a fragile and cruel thing sometimes. He has what he wanted.
You see, this isn’t an average love story. I don’t even know if you could call it a love story at all. I choose to live for him because he earned the right of his ownership. I have never slept in a collar before. I do now with 0 hesitation not because he asked me to but because I can’t bare to remove it. That speaks volumes.
I saw him today and we kissed and I felt his hand wrap around my throat and squeeze until tears rolled down my cheeks. He took me to a desolate, remote location that he owns and is very private. I could have screamed and no one would have heard me. He could have killed me and nobody would have known and I thought to myself “I would die happy” in this moment, in the hands of someone I love.
Find what you love and let it kill you.
Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness.
Let it kill you and let it devour your remains.
For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover.
~ Falsely yours”
― Charles Bukowski